Resurrection
by J.Rain
Summary: First FF, would appreciate reviews. RaexBB. Raven returns after 6 months... almost dead, because she's brought Terra back. But no one knows... yet. Nor do they know the heavy price she's paid, and the heavier price which they all are about to pay.
1. Memories Rewinded

**Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans.**

**Summary: I'm not good at writing summaries. Anyway, my first fanfic, this story (a little long winded, I must admit) centers around Raven and Beastboy. There might be a few hints of other movie/show concepts.**

She entered into the kitchen. It was 8.30am and most of the Titans had already awoken. Raven's violet eyes scanned the room. It was obvious Beastboy wasn't there, for she would have heard Cyborg and him quarrelling over tofu and meat long before she entered a 20 meter radius of the kitchen premises.

Cyborg was whistling away as he fried bacon and eggs. Robin was sitting at the table reading the newspaper and Starfire was attempted to feed Silkie a green glob of goo.

One after another, she returned the cheery "good mornings" of the 3 other titans with her own expressionless greeting.

She started her usual morning routine of making herbal tea.

_They all seem okay today,_ she thought. She didn't have to turn around to see their actions or expressions. She had let down her mental guard slightly and gingerly tested the pools of auras. They were within an acceptable state. She silently sighed in relief.

Having empathic abilities and having to face the other Titans' aura 24/7 was no easy task. During the first few weeks of staying in the newly built T-tower, Raven had trouble dealing with the different auras they displayed. This had resulted in her constant unpredictable mood swings. Nevertheless, over the many months of living together, Raven had gotten used to the feeling of Starfire's suffocating aura of optimism and happiness, Cyborg's strange "half" aura (due to his half human-half robot physique) which sometimes displayed a strange burst in electron activity when he was excited, Robin's strength in maintaining his aura's stability as well as his overwhelming leadership he exuded over the rest, and most of all, Beastboy's hyperactive, bouncing, blinding and deafening aura which never failed to make her cringe and grit her teeth in tolerance.

_Looks like I'm retreating into yet another one of my reflective sessions, _she thought, as the incessant whistling of the kettle jolted her out of her thoughts. The whistling slowly came to a halt as she turned off the fire on the stove.

--

She knew all their auras like the back of her palm, so it wasn't surprising when she felt a change in the changeling. At first, it seemed only natural for him to be moody and depressed over Terra's "death". It wasn't exactly death, because Terra had turned to stone. But nevertheless, he still missed her. In fact, all the titans were rather upset over Terra's stone-ness. The dimness of their auras was hard to ignore. Raven even surprised herself when she found herself feeling a little gloomy over Terra's sacrifice. After all, she was the one who had the least trust in the blonde and taken the longest time to accept her. Feeling gloomy wasn't something she'd expected from herself.

Back then, after a couple of weeks, everyone was still rather shaken by the incident. The one who surprised everyone was Beastboy. He was the first to stand up, return to his cheery, normal self and actually slap everyone else back to reality. Time to move on, he said. He was back to good ol' annoying Beastboy – that is, to everyone else other than Raven.

She had to admit, he had been very strong and brave in pulling himself together, and he certainly was a very good actor. Without her ability to sense emotions and auras, Raven probably wouldn't have seen the pain he hid. Nowadays, his aura was extremely weak, so dim to the point that she thought it might die out like a tiny flame on a candle being pounded with breaths and blows of carbon dioxide. His eyes never showed the sincere, genuine Beastboy they all knew.

He obviously wasn't himself. On some late nights, when she went down to the kitchen for some tea, she could hear him weeping in his sleep when she passed by her room. Her room and his room were beside each other on the same level, and his was beside the elevator so she had to inevitable pass by his room in order to get to her desired destination (there were times when she simply did not feel like using her powers). The crying started off on daily basis right after Terra's stoning. Raven couldn't help but feel her heart wrench at the sound of his trembling, almost child-like inner voice. Her sound-proofed walls could not block out the cries of his heart, his soul.

She, of all people, should know how it felt like to be betrayed. She still carried scars of Malchior buried deep in her heart.

She quickly pushed the thoughts of the dragon out of her mind.

--

After pouring the hot water into her cup, Raven carried her mug using her telekinetic energy and placed it carefully on the breakfast table. She dipped her tea bag in and out of the hot water. In, out, in, out, in, out, swirl around. The clear hot water gradually changed into a warm caramel color. She breathed in its soothing aroma as she resumed her thoughts.

--

Raven hated to see Beastboy so unhappy. She hated to see anyone unhappy. After all, normal people like him, or anyone else, could express their emotions without having to worry about blowing up the world. Why should they spend their time being all gloomy when they could, instead, run jump and scream without causing unwanted chaos? She made a silent vow she was going to look for some way to cure Terra, to release her from her stone prison and restore happiness among the titans – happiness that only Terra could bring. But right now, something else took precedence – someone. Someone else needed curing, someone who was hurt very badly, and his wound was something that her soul self couldn't reach, let alone her healing glowing blue hands.

She remembered that night…

--

"Oh well, it's worth a try," she told herself quietly as she stood outside the changeling's door.

His cries, though only whimpering and whining, were loud and clear from where she stood. She knocked on the door, "Beastboy?" she hissed, fairly loudly.

All she heard was more whimpering.

He must be having a hell-of-a nightmare.

"Beastboy!" she said a little louder, her voice sounded slightly annoyed.

That should have been loud enough to wake him…

The whimpering stopped. She heard a gasp, a thud and then a groan.

Yep, he's awake.

--

_Speaking of awake… _Raven thought.

Beastboy entered the kitchen.

_11am, _she thought as she glanced at the clock, right on time. _Have I been thinking that long?_

He shouted a lazy "good morning" to everyone else and yawned. He had earphones on, obviously pointing out the fact that he was listening to his iPod. As usual, the morning-hater was the last one down.

Beastboy didn't know why he was listening to his iPod. After all, the songs only caused him to feel all "emo" and sad. Each song reminded him of Terra in one way or another. Maybe it was because he wanted to distract himself from Raven. Ever since that night, he had been feeling uncomfortable around her. Yet whenever she wasn't around, he felt empty. Either way, whenever he thought of her, his thoughts would inevitably stumble upon that night.

Seeing him in such a reclusive state under the heavy influence of his music to drown out hidden pain reminded Raven of how difficult it really was to get him to open up.

As her thoughts wandered back, so did his.

--

"Beastboy, let me in," Raven was rather irritated, but tried not to show it in the way she said it.

No reply.

"Beastboy, I know you're in there and that you're awake. Now let me in,"

--

_Darn, why is she here, of all people, of all times… _he glanced at the clock – _2.09am!_

He quietly walked to his door, but he didn't open it. Standing a few feet away from the door that separated him from her, a million thoughts swam through his mind.

He couldn't let her come into his room, not in this condition. No, he didn't give a damn about the rotting vegetarian pizzas under his bed, or the piles of dirty laundry scattered around, or the fact that he was only in a pair of navy boxers with yellow rubber duck prints on them.

He couldn't let him see him – all sweaty, scarlet-eyed, ruby-nosed and emotionally and psychologically unstable. What would she think of him if she saw him like that? He'd never hear the end of it. Broken, rickety, sad, weak – he had to be strong. He was Beastboy, after all. Although inside him, at the back of his head, was a voice that told him he was the weak one who lagged behind, he still told himself that he was the strong one who moved along.

--

"Just go away Raven," he said in a hateful voice, "I want to be alone." He had said it with so much hate that Raven felt as if she had been stung by a deadly man-of-war.

"No," she said firmly. She could sense his heart crying out silent words of despair anyone could hear. She didn't need her empathic powers to tell that. It was all in the tone, the manner he had said it, the tremble in his voice.

--

He could see the shadow of her legs from under his door. Beastboy eyed it like an eagle watching its prey. No, he didn't want her to go, not one bit.

"Don't make me hurt you," Beastboy could have punched himself as the words spilled out of his mouth. He clenched his fist so hard that his claws dug into his palm, drawing blood. He hated lying. The truth was, he'd never hurt her, ever. It was in his blood not to harm her in any way possible. Why am I doing this? He asked himself, as he continued standing in the darkness.

--

"You won't," she said, surprised at how soft and gentle her voice was. Raven knew that he wouldn't hurt her. She had remembered the time when the Beast within him took over most of his thoughts and actions. Even then, Beastboy hadn't even scratched her. On the contrary, he had fought for her to protect her from the maddened, savage and crazed Adonis, also affected by the same dangerous gene modifying chemical.

"Why should you care?" he asked, "You're the one who doesn't care about my jokes, you're the one always making me look like a fool, you're the one who makes me feel bad, you're the one who pushes people away. You're the one who doesn't care about how people feel! You don't care, ever!"

The words cut her heart, but she stood her ground, silently contemplating her next move. She could sense the urgency and hurt in his voice, and she couldn't help but feel chills of guilt running up and down her body.

_He's right, I have been kind of a jerk… But it's partially his fault! He made me feel this way… _she decided to go back to her room.

_No stop it Raven, stop blaming him, he's right. You're the one who's at fault and you're the one who should be helping. You deserve it, you deserve to feel horrible. You're just some demon-spawn..._

_Then again, he said to leave him alone. You of all people should know the need for solitude. What to do..._

She felt chills run along her whole body despite the fact that her nightwear was a long sleeved black gown that swept the floor designed specifically to keep her warm at night. Using her dark powers, she sunk into the floor.

--

Raven felt somebody tap her shoulder. She jerked out of her thoughts as Robin pointed towards the carton of milk on the table which had turned black. Several utensils hovered around dangerously, also engulfed in black energy. She mumbled an apology and quickly regained control of her powers to prevent the milk from bursting. Then she picked up the newspaper and started browsing through the latest headlines.

Beastboy sat down opposite Raven and pretended to be engrossed in eating and listening to music. Out of the corner of his eye, Beastboy could see Raven's expression. He knew that look. She was deep in thought – and everyone knew better than to disturb her from her trance unless absolutely necessary. As Robin turned to face him, he gave his usual cheesy smile.

He did feel a little mad and jealous when Raven didn't flare up when Robin had distracted her. Then again, it was necessary in case someone got hurt. _Why?_ He asked himself. _Why am I getting so worked up about small things like that? Robin is being practical. Gah, calm down Beastboy, calm down…_

--

Beastboy took deep breaths as he maintained his cool. He was mad, he was upset, but he couldn't let her see him cry. He continued eyeing the shadow cast by her feet, which eventually moved away, slowly and hesitantly.

He sighed in relief as tears sprung to his eyes. His mind was in spinning as he crumpled to the floor and choked back tears. Had he been too harsh? Why was he acting that way? Why was he pushing her away when he wanted so badly to be comforted? Just like the way Terra used to comfort him… Terra, Terra, Terra, Terra…

Suddenly, he felt a pair of slender arms wrap around him. He twitched in surprise and shock. As part animal, his body temperature had always been higher than humans and the pair of cold arms was shockingly cold to his skin. Through blurred eyes, he saw the arms were draped in black, loose, long sleeves. The only person it could be was…

--

"R-Rae…?" he looked up, eyes glistening and bloodshot. His small petite form still curled up on the floor under her arms.

When Raven entered his room, she had seen his pitiful state. Without thinking, she had silently sat down beside his small green body and given him a hug.

"Shh…" She hugged him slightly tighter, "just let it go, Beastboy, cry it out…"

She stroked his tousled green hair and continued to reassure him. Normally, it wasn't like her to do such a thing, but this wasn't a "normal" circumstance. She gently wiped his tear stained face with a cool damp towel which she transported from her room, with him still in her embrace. Somehow, she was thankful that this changeling hadn't reached his growth spurt yet. He was still smaller than her and at least she could still hold him comfortably. Against his hot skin, her cold half-demonic skin burned. She was tempted to recoil from the sudden heat, but she chose to hang on.

--

"Raven, is everything alright?" Robin asked. He had been observing her most of the morning. Behind his mask, no one could tell whether he was looking at them, or simply deep in thought. It did annoy her at times. "You haven't turned the page for the past half an hour."

"Huh?" She jerked out of her trance, "Yeah, I'm just thinking," she replied, as she continued sipping her tea. Apparently, the newspaper wasn't distracting enough.

"Hey B, you alright?" asked Cyborg. Cyborg was an older brother, and he was second to Raven in determining the well fare of his friends, especially Beastboy. He had noticed Beastboy's rather strange behavior the whole morning, despite his smiles and cheeriness. His expression was that of one that even his high-tech modern cybernetic system could not fully determine.

"Yep, everything's fine!" Beastboy said rather loudly, for he couldn't exactly hear himself. Though he was listening to his iPod Beastboy was actually paying close attention to Raven.

He noticed the way her amethyst eyes were so fixed onto the gray paper, yet so far away. He also liked the way her long purple hair framed her face.

I wonder what she's thinking of… he wondered.

Occasionally, a stubborn strand or two of hair would fall across her face for the umpteenth time. She'd then stare annoyingly at it before blowing it, causing the lock to fly a little before settling back over her eyes. Her eyebrows would knit into a slight frown, as if contemplating which one in a million different ways she should use to get rid of it. Eventually, she would simply push it back behind her ear.

Just like Terra.

--

Terra

Beastboy couldn't hold back any longer. The tears just flowed as memories came flooding back. His journey along memory lane was torturous. The time when Terra stepped into his life, her character, her smile, her laughs, the blissful times they had, they were all moments of unbridled joy. Then came her betrayal, her attempt at murder, her realization, her sacrifice…

All this while, Raven had been walking down the lane with him..

After about an hour, Beastboy calmed down. Raven slowly started to detach her weary body from the changeling.

Beastboy soon regained a clearer train of thought. Once he did, he realized what had been really going on, "Oh my... Raven, I'm so sorry," he pulled away immediately, afraid that he might have gotten too close and invaded her personal space.

Raven merely kept quiet and slowly stood up. Her legs were already numb and cramped due to the weird sitting positions she and Beastboy got into while on the floor, "It doesn't matter," her voice was back its usual impassive tone.

Whew, she's still Raven. He thought. Right now he didn't care about whether she'd dig out his intestines through his belly button and wrapped it around his body. All that mattered now to him was that Raven cared. Even though he couldn't understand why she was so mean sometimes, at least now he knew that… she cared.

Raven walked towards the door, her hood was up.

"Raven?" he asked in a trembling voice.

All the little actions she did which showed she cared flashed before his mind.

From the very first moment, when they fought the aliens who captured Starfire, that battle – he remembered that incident very clearly. Being separated from the Doom Patrol for quite some time had left him out of shape and soft. He felt himself hurl through the air as one of the aliens hit him. He had been too stunned to attack and his back hit the wall with a sickening thud. He thought his life would end there and then when he saw the alien head towards him, ready to pound him into tofu mush. But that moment never came, for she had been there. She protected him. She helped him up.

Then there was the first time they encountered the Hive. The Titans had really taken a beating, and his leg got injured in the fight. It hurt like hell to the point, but after a while he couldn't even tell if it were a hairline fracture or broken bone because the nerves there had been severed and he felt numb. She had helped him all the way back to Titans Tower, and she had cured him. She had expressed genuine concern for him – the green irritating talkative corny grass stain who could never make her laugh.

--

Raven stopped in her tracks as her mind tensed up. _What is it now? I showed him I cared, what more does he want?_

She didn't bother to turn around.

"Thank you," she heard him mutter, "for caring"

Her mind relaxed.

"Anytime," she replied.

Raven headed back to her room, bewildered at what she had just done. It was a truthful answer, "anytime", because from that day onwards, Beastboy could indeed thank her even more "for caring". That was merely the first time she had shown her care, and she wasn't going to make it her last.

Like mentioned before, Beastboy's nightmares had been going on for several months already. But gradually, they were getting less and less frequent as Raven's secret night visits increased. Beastboy couldn't think of a possible way to thank Raven.

In a way, this rough period of time for him was a blessing in disguise. He had to endure the nightmares – they couldn't just disappear overnight, but at the same time, his friendship with Raven had bloomed. They had developed a mutual understanding for each other. It was a very strong concoction of friendship with a pinch of love.

Raven had realized this too, and made extra effort to be more tolerant of his behavior and actions. Under her care, his aura strengthened. Deep down inside him, she knew that a part of him still missed Terra. She cared for her teammate, so much that she wanted him to be happy. I will bring Terra back, somehow. She vowed.

--

"Ow!" Raven winced a little as hot tea splashed onto her lap. The tea should have been cooler, but her mind had sub-consciously heat it up to a scalding hot degree as well as causing her mug to explode under the stress she was creating via her mind.

Beastboy sprang into action with reflexes even faster than Robin's. He grabbed the nearest kitchen cloth and ran to her side. Desperate to rid her of her discomfort somehow, he quickly wiped away the hot liquid with as tenderly as possible, sometimes only barely brushing or dabbing the cloth over her skin, causing Raven to shiver from the tingling, ticklish sensation.

"Beastboy," Raven said. Her voice wasn't fierce or threatening, just… shocked. He realized what he was doing and squeaked a little in fright. Bracing himself for a trip through 5 walls, he started apologizing profusely.

Raven put up her hood to hide a blush that was creeping up her cheeks. Somewhere in the tower a few light bulbs burst. "Thanks," she said, "I'll go clean myself up." With a swish of her cloak, she was gone.

--

Back in her room, Raven placed her cloak and tea-smelling leotard in the laundry basket, showered, and changed into a fresh leotard. She threw on a new cloak and headed to the roof to meditate.

Beastboy, in the meantime, was still in the kitchen cleaning up after Raven.

"You know, she's the one who made the mess," commented Robin, as he stood up preparing to leave the common room.

"Yeah, I know," Beastboy flashed a cheerful smile, "but hey, all of you know she's been helping me a lot. It's the least I can do."

"Very well," said Robin, as he walked out of the common room.

--

The titans had recently found out about Beastboy's secret breakdowns. One night, Robin had decided to travel up to the roof for some fresh air, and to get to the roof, he passed by the two titan's bedrooms. As he did, he heard Beastboy's whimpers. Out of curiosity and concern, he entered the room to find Raven sitting on the floor beside Beastboy's lower bunk holding his hand and comforting him while he lay down in his bed. As a team leader, Robin assured him that the rest of the Titans wouldn't make fun of him and still treat him the same. He also convinced him that telling the others about his condition would be a benefit rather than a loss.

To Beastboy's surprise, what Robin said was true. Everyone else had become more understanding, yet they didn't treat him any different from the way they did before. Cyborg still mercilessly kicked his butt at games, Starfire still forced him to eat all her Tamaranean dishes, Silkie still tried to eat his CDs, Robin still treated him the same way he'd treat all the other Titans, and Raven still made sarcastic remarks, though she had made it clear to him that she was only teasing him and didn't mean to hurt him.

--

"Raven?"

Raven's eyes shot open in shock. Somewhere behind her, a volleyball that had been left lying around exploded.

"Whoa, sorry for scaring you," Robin apologized as he sat down beside her. Like her, he faced the horizon, soaking himself in the blue hues of the sky and sea.

"If you're going to ask about Beastboy, he's better. Nightmares are getting less frequent and his depression is wearing off," she said in a very matter-of-fact tone.

"Er, yeah, about Beastboy. I really appreciate what you've done for him," Robin said, "but will he ever get over it?"

"Her," she corrected.

"Right, her. I mean, I'm not the only one who doesn't want to see him like that," he continued, "and I'm not the only one who doesn't want to see you like this."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't want or like to see you like this Raven. You've obviously been trying very hard to help him, I know that, he knows that, everyone knows that, but I don't want to see your health going down the drain in the process."

_It already has been. You noticed? _She thought.

"You're obviously much more tired that usual, don't try to deny that. Your eye bags say it all…"

She didn't deny the fact that she had been drained lately due to the lack of sleep, but Beastboy wasn't entirely at fault.

"…and your performance has been affected. I'm worried for you,"

"Your point is?"

"Beastboy needs to snap out of it soon. What are you going to do? Continue sleeping at his side for the rest of his life? You have a life too, Raven,"

"Of course not,"

"Then what are you going to do?"

"Like you said, make him snap out of it,"

"How?"

"Somehow,"

With that, she sunk into the floor and back into her room.

--

Preview to next chapter:

"A splash of boiling water  
A splash of molten lava  
A splash of pure acid  
A splash of snake venom  
A tear of sorrow  
3 mouthfuls of blood  
All from one.

'From pain and sorrow  
A life may arise  
From happiness and joy,  
Another may demise'  
Read by the one.  
_  
_

_Looks like I'm going to die, again. _Raven thought sarcastically casually...

**What is Raven planning to do?**

**Note: This story might undergo some changes and edits along the way.**


	2. Arise & Demise

**THANK YOU for all your reviews! I've spent a really long time (at least a few months) on this story and working on the plot, so your feedback really means a lot to me! Anyway, based on the previous chapters feedback, I've made this chapter shorter.**

_I never thought I'd have to do this… _she thought, as she carried out the procedures similar to that when she went back to Azarath to contact her mother. The team wants him to be back to normal? Fine! She sat in her usual lotus position and repeated her usual mantra.

In a flash, she felt herself being sucked into a dark underground tomb. A musty smell greeted her while flame-lit torches burned on the walls as she walked through, while strange plants of sorts grew all around.

_Strange,_ she thought. _Plants are only able to grow in the presence of light._

Then again, in the spirit realm, anything was possible.

"What brings you here, demon-spawn?"

"Tiara," Raven greeted, as she turned around.

Tiara was clad in a long, loose gold dress with sleeves that swept the ground. Her tan skin seemed to glow in the dark. On her long dark brown hair was a crown of leaves. She didn't have feet which touched the ground, for Tiara was a spirit – a blind spirit, which explained her white eyes. Underground, sight was not a necessity for the Earth Goddess.

Raven restrained herself from blowing up the Earth Goddess, "I know that I'm not welcome here, but this important matter does not concern me. It concerns a well-being of a friend, a friend from the world of the living. I would appreciate it if you put aside my status as a demon-child and hear me out," she pleaded.

Tiara hesitated for a moment, "Very well, continue your story, I haven't got all day. Tokyo is due for an Earthquake soon," Tiara said. Her voice echoed through the tunnel.

"My friend lost someone he loved very much, and I wish to help him,"

"By bringing back the dead? The Spirit Guard should be the one you seek."

"Yes, but this is different. The victim has been trapped in stone."

The Earth Goddess tapped her chin and spent a few moments thinking.

"You speak of the girl Terra?"

"Yes,"

"Ah, so the rumors are true, she has been stoned," the Earth Goddess frowned, "no wonder it's been pretty peaceful around here."

"Is there a way to bring her back?" Raven asked.

"There is, but it is a neither easy nor pleasant procedure."

"Please, your highness, I'd like to know how,"

"Why?"

"It is for the sake of my... team" Raven hesitated on the last word.

Tiara smiled to herself for a short while. Still, her heart didn't soften. She wasn't Goddess of Mercy and she had to get to Tokyo in 20 minutes to ensure a smooth going of a rough earthquake of magnitude 8.5. Mercy was definitely irrelevant.

"Very well, but I have warned you," Tiara said as a tattered scroll magically appeared in her hand. She handed it to Raven, "Just a little reminder. This task has to be done with your own bare hands." Raven braced herself. The return journey back to the normal world was never pleasant. Tiara's wooden Earth staff appeared in her hand. She flew towards Raven at top speed and using her staff, gave Raven's head a hard whack. Raven winced in pain and blacked out.

--

Meanwhile, Beastboy had finished tidying up the kitchen and had returned to his room. He bent down and took out a small box from under his bed for the hundredth time. He smoothed out a few creases here and there before holding it out in front of himself, grinning a small smile of satisfaction.

"Okay Beastboy," he took a deep breath, "you can do this."

He stood up and marched out the door.

--

Raven opened her eyes.

She was back in the room and had the scroll in her hand. She stood up and wobbled to her bed. She was still suffering the after effects of the hard whack. _There must be an easier way to come back from a spirit's realm, _she thought painfully. The reason why the process of getting back to the mortal realm was so painful was to deter any mortal beings from trying to get into the spirit realm. Unrolling the scroll, she read through the procedure.

"A splash of boiling water  
A splash of molten lava  
A splash of pure acid  
A splash of snake venom  
A tear of sorrow  
3 mouthfuls of blood  
All from one."

_Where the heck am I going to get these materials without raising suspicion? _Raven cringed. This indeed wasn't an easy task. Spells given by Gods or Goddesses were always taken literally.

_"This task has to be done with your own bare hands..."_

The statement was indeed exactly what she had to do. On the scroll were pictures which she had to follow. She had to use her bare hands to splash all the materials onto the statue - a painful and dangerous process. A tear of sorrow was going to be hard for Raven due to her need to control emotions. 3 mouthfuls of blood meant she was going to have to somehow cough it up.

There was more.

"'From pain and sorrow  
A life will arise  
From happiness and joy,  
Another may demise'  
Read by the one."

_Hmm... _may _demise,_ She sighed and weighed her options. _Bring Terra back and risk __dying, or don't bring Terra back and just sit around and do nothing_Did she really need to bother thinking?

_Looks like I'm going to die, again. _Raven thought sarcastically casually, as she remembered the time when her father tried to take over the world._ My powers are going out of control anyway, and I'm pretty sure I know why.. I might as well just die so no one else will get hurt._

Raven was drowning her mind with reasons why running away was the best choice so she didn't have the chance to consider the doubts as she packed her bag.

_Beastboy will be so much happier and so will the other Titans. They'd be overjoyed to see her. It's for their sake, their sake. Think _utilitarianism _Raven, for the benefit of the majority._

She recalled the time when both Terra and her had the fight after she defeated overload. Terra's words had pierced painfully through her, but Raven knew what Terra said was true to a certain extent.

Along with a few sets of her clothes she took 6 containers for the 6 materials she was going to need. Using her powers, it didn't take her long to finish packing.

Just then there was a knock on the door.

"Uh, coming," she said as she stuffed her bag under her bed and answered the door. It was Beastboy. She frowned, "What?"

"Um… I just wanted to thank you for all you've done…" Beastboy said. His green face was turning red. He wasn't sure whether to feel angry or guilty. Angry, because he had plucked up so much courage just to say those words to her, yet all she did was snap at him. Guilty, because he had probably disturbed her.

Her expression softened ever so slightly, "Oh. Well…"

"I wanted to give you this," he said as he handed her a little present wrapped in dark blue shiny wrapping paper and a light blue ribbon.

As soon as she took the present he made a hasty exit, only to be stopped by Raven, "Beastboy,"

"Uh, yeah?" he turned around.

"Thanks," she smiled slightly. But the smile disappeared as soon as she heard the light bulb above her head crack. She retreated back into her room.

She smiled! Beastboy thought to himself as he punched the air in satisfaction. She smiled!

--

Back in her room, Raven sat down cross-legged and looked at the present in her hand. Beastboy had certainly put a lot of effort into wrapping it, for she could see quite a few creased areas where the paper had been folded before. Beastboy had obviously tried to smooth them out. Carefully, she unwrapped the present.

Inside was a box, and she carefully opened it up. It was a shimmering diamond elvish pendant that had caught her eye at the mall the other day. As she gingerly held it up by the glittering chain, Raven sighed in relief as no reaction took place between her skin and the chain. Beastboy had remembered that her skin was allergic to pure materials such as silver and gold due to her demonic blood.

_Beastboy... _Raven thought as she sighed and shook her head. _You're making this so much more difficult than it needs to be..._

She picked up a dark purple pen and a piece of scented, light lavender paper and started writing.

--

Preview to next chapter:

Beastboy sighed and lay back on his bed as he clutched rather crumpled note to his chest. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. As he opened them, he looked towards the calendar on his desk...

-

The last thing Terra remembered was preventing the underground volcano from destroying Jump City. Suddenly, she found herself struggling to free herself from some kind of covering. At first, she couldn't breathe. At the last moment when she was about to suffocate, she had managed to break free from whatever covered her. Slumped on the ground in front of her was a lifeless body of…

--

**Terra comes back, but what will happen to Raven?**


	3. The Awakening

**I couldn't resist putting up another chapter today!**

--

_Dear Titans,_

_I'm going through a demon-pubertal stage so I've left to recuperate. Give me about 3 months._

_Yours truly,  
Raven_

Beastboy read the neat cursive writings for the umpteenth time. He sighed and lay back on his bed as he clutched rather crumpled note to his chest. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. As he opened them, he looked towards the calendar on his desk.

3 months, she had been gone for exactly 3 months. It was almost the end of the day and there was no sign of her.

_Raven, when are you coming home?_ He asked himself as he turned onto his side._ I... miss you._

When she first left, the team was devastated. Raven had not even bid them farewell, but they later learnt to accept the fact that she left, and there was no point brooding over the past.

Beastboy had almost slipped into depression again, but he remembered his promise to Raven that he would never ever do that again, and so he controlled himself, holding on to the small spark of hope that she would return to the Teen Titans.

--

- Boiling water  
- Molten lava  
- Pure acid  
- Snake venom

_There, I've got almost all the materials, now to get back to Terra's cave, _Raven thought as she flew back to the cave

"Here goes…" Raven thought out loud as she brought out the six jars. The magic spell she placed on them had enabled the materials to stay in their conditions throughout the journey.

The only two empty jars left meant for the tear of sorrow and 3 mouthfuls of blood.

"Might as well get them over with," she said aloud once again. Raven thought of the saddest thing possible: the death of her mother, and the tears flowed freely. She let one tear fall from her face and land in the jar.

Next was the hard part: 3 mouthfuls of blood?

Raven cringed and remembered the technique she learnt in Egypt while in search of the snake venom. Bracing herself for the procedure, she channeled energy to her chest and exerted a force, breaking a few blood vessels in one of her lungs. Before she knew it, she was in a painful coughing fit and had coughed out 3 mouthfuls of blood into the jar.

Raven continued coughing even after she collected the necessary amount of blood. She had expected this. After an intense coughing fit, she calmed herself down.

Her hands trembled as she opened the jars. Her powers could heal her, but she didn't want to waste time waiting.

She stood before the statue, her powers levitating the jars until they were within reach. She put up her hood and raised opened the jars using telekinesis.

"From pain and sorrow…"

She cringed as her right hand cupped the surface of the boiling water while her left did the same for the lava and she quickly splashed the statue. The statue started making crackling sounds,

"… A life may arise…"

The acid ate away at her right hand and the snake venom, her left, as she splashed the statue with the two other materials. The statue cracked in certain areas.

"… From happiness and joy…"

She could feel her head spinning as she struggled to breathe when she placed a finger which held the tear of sorrow onto the statue. The tear sizzled and dissolved into the statue as parts of it began falling apart.

"… Another may demise."

Raven felt herself losing consciousness as she used her remaining strength to splash the blood onto the statue. She felt the energy inside her drain as the statue absorbed her energy and exploded, spreading dust and dirt all around. The already weakened Raven bent down and used her cloak to shield herself from the debris.

The last thing she saw before succumbing to darkness was a blonde figure clad in a metallic armor emerging from the smoke.

--

"B! Come on we're going to start the movie!" Cyborg's voice sounded over the communicator.

"Coming…" Beastboy replied, as he reluctantly got up from the bed and walked downstairs.

--

The last thing Terra remembered was preventing the underground volcano from destroying Jump City. Suddenly, she found herself struggling to free herself from some kind of covering. At first, she couldn't breathe. At the last moment when she was about to suffocate, she had managed to break free from whatever covered her. Slumped on the ground in front of her was a lifeless body of…

"Raven?" she shouted. Though Raven had never really been on Terra's "friend" list, she wasn't exactly on the extreme end of her "foe" one either. After all, both of them had made the effort to try and be friends. Terra concluded that whatever happened to herself had something to do with Raven.

Although still a little shaky after the incident, Terra ran towards the cloaked girl.

"Raven! What happened? Are you alright?" she asked frantically. Seeing that the other titans were not around, Terra got worried. _What was she doing here? Where are we?_ The first place to bring Raven that came to her mind was Titan's Tower.

Although Raven had a petite figure, Terra was practically skin and bones, rendering her unable to support Raven back. Thinking fast, Terra used her powers to summon a rock big enough for Raven to lie on and herself to stand on. It ripped out from the earth and Terra carefully placed the sorceress onto the stone before climbing onto it. Her hands grew yellow as she navigated the stone up towards the surface of the Earth, using boulders to create a clear exit.

As she made her way to Titans Tower, the past rushed back to her faster than the speed which she was moving at.

--

Cyborg, Starfire, Beastboy and Robin were watching a movie in the common room. Plasmus, Cinderblock and Overload had broken out of jail that day – again, and they had a tough time taking them down. Though he had his eyes fixed on the screen, Robin's mind was racing with thoughts of how they kept breaking out of jail under maximum security, and who was the one behind all this.

Robin was so deep in thought that when the doorbell rang he jumped 3 feet into the air and whipped out his bostaff.

"Relax friend Robin, it is merely the bell of the door, I shall go and answer it," Starfire said, as she placed a reassuring gloved hand on the Titans leader's shoulder. She flew to the door and opened it. In front of her was a familiar blue cloaked figure lying on the ground, motionless.

"Raven?" she asked as she bent over to remove the hood that covered the figure's face. She gasped, "Friend Raven!"

Robin, Cyborg and Beastboy all ran towards the door at top speed.

Beastboy passed out when he saw Raven slumped on the ground, motionless.

Cyborg ran up to her and picked up her hand to check her pulse. His robotic arm recoiled when he saw the state her hands were in. They were badly burnt and at some points, her flesh was almost gone. _Okay, that white thingy there that I just saw is not her bone, it is NOT! _He thought to himself. He checked her neck instead. There was hardly any pulse.

"We have to get her to the infirmary now!" he screamed, as he picked up her lifeless figure and ran towards the lift.

"Star, I'll follow Cyborg. Stay here and take care of Beastboy," Robin ordered as he ran after Cyborg. He didn't want Starfire to face the trauma of seeing Raven in this condition, and he knew Beastboy would freak out once he saw the state Raven was in. Starfire immediately obeyed.

--

"Cyborg, how is she?" Robin asked.

"Doesn't look good Rob," Cyborg said, "this is SOME demonic-pubertal stage..."

Robin walked over to the purple-haired figure and watched as Cyborg wrapped her left hand in a bandage. He glanced over at Raven's left hand, which hadn't been wrapped yet. Though her hands were healing themselves slowly, his eyes still widened in shock behind his mask when he saw the kind of injuries they had sustained.

"Oh my God…" he said as he brought his hand up to his mouth.

--

Beastboy came around, "What… what happened? Star! I dreamt that Raven came back! That must have been some dream."

"No Beastboy, you are not in the land of dreams." Starfire said, and she pinched him hard to prove her point.

"Ow! That's going to leave a bruise! I'm awake, okay, okay, but… how… it can't be…" he stumbled as he recalled what had just happened. "That means… Raven! Raven where is she?" Beastboy asked.

"Raven is in the firm of the ary," Starfire looked down sadly.

"Um…" It took him a few seconds to register "in the firm of the ary" meant "infirmary", "Oh man…" Beastboy stood up, "Let's go check on her."

--

"How is she?" asked Beastboy as he raced up to the unconscious figure.

"She's exhausted and not in very good shape, both physically and mentally," Cyborg explained, "She's got a high fever, she's lost a lot of weight, she's got very bad burns, she has snake venom running through her veins, I found traces of pure sulphuric acid on her, her energy has been drained and there are a few burst arteries in her right lung. She's in a coma now, but she's still healing some of the minor injuries by herself. But I'm still not sure whether she'll make it."

"Raven…" Beastboy carefully placed a gloved hand on her forearm hidden beneath the white sheets. He felt like hugging her there and then.

"Beastboy, it's best if we don't touch her. Her wounds can get easily infected," Cyborg warned. Beastboy immediately removed his hand and cursed himself for his carelessness.

"It's okay Beastboy, you did not know," Starfire said nicely, as she placed her hand on his arm.

"We should all get a good rest." Robin suggested.

"No! What if Raven wakes up and runs away again?" asked Beastboy, who was close to tears. Everyone else seemed reluctant to leave as well.

"Very well, we'll take turns watching her," Robin said.

"Can… can I watch her for tonight?" asked Beastboy.

Nobody objected.

"Cheer up friends, I'm sure Raven will not like to see us so sad," Starfire tried her best to sound cheerful as she flew back to her room.

--

Chapter Preview:

"You won't get away with this, Vines!" Robin snarled.

"I'm afraid you won't get away either Robin, not until Raven agrees to come with me," the man said, "So Raven, do we have a deal?"

"No friend Raven, run, quick!"

"Don't listen to him Rae!" shouted Cyborg.

Raven felt herself say, "No,"

"Then your friends are of no use to me," he said, as the vines crushed them. One after another, their struggling stopped, "and I'll have to do this the hard way," he dropped their lifeless bodies to the ground and they landed with sickening "thuds", all except…

--

**Where did Terra go?  
**


	4. Fevered Visions or Nightmares?

**I'll be going to Malaysia, Penang, for a week. If I can internet connection there, I'll post a few more chapters. In the meantime, enjoy!**

--

Raven looked around at her surroundings. She was on the Titan's rooftop. She was standing at the entrance to the door. She could see her teammates fighting off many huge vines. Among the vines was a man dressed in a one-piece green suit. He had spiky white hair and glowing green eyes. Held in one of the vines was a crying Terra.

"So Raven, do we have a deal?" the white-haired man asked.

"Raven! Get out of here!" ordered Robin, as he fought off a huge green vine using his bow staff. He threw out his bird-a-rang and it sliced a vine off easily.

Raven wanted desperately to help her friends, but she had no control over her body. It just stood rooted to the ground, disobeying her every command. She felt her body try to summon her powers, but to no avail.

Cyborg took out his new flame-phaser cannon and pointed it towards a vine and shot it, turning it into a black crisp hunk of ash which was blown away with the wind.

"That blast drained almost all of my power! I don't have enough for another one!" Cyborg replied, as he ran away from an onslaught of whipping vines.

"Get Raven out of here!" Robin said.

Cyborg ran towards Raven, but he was restrained by four vines, each wrapped around his robotic limbs.

Starfire's starbolts were working well against the vines, but as more vines headed in her direction, soon her limbs were restrained and she couldn't neither move nor summon her powers. "Robin!" she cried helplessly.

"Starfire!" he shouted back. He gave the vine he was attacking a final whack and turned towards her. Unfortunately he was also held back by many vines.

She looked around for Beastboy. He had been trying to free Terra in every animal form he knew possible, but his efforts were in vain. A bunch of vines also restrained him, tearing him away from the vines that held Terra.

"Let… Me… GO!" roared Beastboy.

"You won't get away with this, Vines!" Robin snarled.

"I'm afraid you won't get away either Robin, not until Raven agrees to come with me," the man said, "So Raven, do we have a deal?"

"No friend Raven, run, quick!"

"Don't listen to him Rae!" shouted Cyborg.

Raven felt herself say, "No,"

"Then your friends are of no use to me," he said, as the vines crushed them, one after another, their struggling stopped, "and I'll have to do this the hard way," he dropped their lifeless bodies to the ground and they landed with sickening "thuds", all except Terra.

--

It was noon and Starfire was on "watch Raven" duty when Raven sat up in bed gasping for air and clutching her throat.

"Cyborg! You must come quickly! Friend Raven… she…"

Cyborg was up before you could say "boo-yah", but not fast enough, for Raven had already slipped back into unconsciousness.

--

Raven found herself in a pitch black environment. The only thing visible was Terra.

"You must be wondering. What the hell am I doing here? Well, after you brought me back, I regained my memory. And I learnt a lot of things – a lot of things which was intentionally hidden from ME, and you KNOW I don't like that.

Oh yes, Raven. I remember my past, or should I say, our past AND future."

Terra's usually blue eyes were no longer blue. Instead, they were a mixture of crimson and orange. Her fangs extended noticeably. She hissed for a second before her looks changed back to normal.

Just then yet another vision hit her. She couldn't exactly tell what it was, but she could make out buildings, ice, snow and machines marching down roads flashing befor her eyes.

"Which reminds me," in a split second she was back in the pitch black environment with Terra, "the Brotherhood of Evil is coming back!" She giggled evilly, "A pity the others won't be around to see them take over the world," she fake-sniffed a little, "especially Beastboy. Well, enough small talk, I'm going to finish my job," she said as she hurled a boulder out of the darkness towards her.

--

"What's wrong with her Cyborg?" asked Starfire.

"Her fever is rising to a dangerous level!" Cyborg said as he frantically prepared the ice bath.

--

"Hello, Raven,"

That voice… it was so familiar…

"We meet again,"

Slade.

"I've learnt more about your past too, Halfling. Or should I say, mixed breed?"

--

"Her fever is still rising!" said Cyborg, as he monitored Raven's steaming body via the computer. Beastboy and Robin were up and rushing around preparing yet another ice bath while Starfire helped to sponge her. Since she was a girl, it was only right that Starfire did the sponging.

--

"So Raven, do we have a deal?"

"No friend Raven, run, quick!"

"Don't listen to him Rae!" shouted Cyborg.

This time, Raven felt herself say, "Yes,"

"Very good…" Vines said as he placed all the other titans on the ground. They were still held down by the vines so they couldn't move, "Unfortunately, this is going to sting," he sniggered as a bunch of thorny vines headed her way.

As she held her last breath, out of the corner of her eye, she could see Terra smirk.

--

"Raven's fever has stopped rising," an exhausted Cyborg announced as he wiped sweat off his human brow, "but it's still rather high."

Over the past 8 strenuous hours, they had already given her an ice-bath 10 times, and given her medicine, but each time they did, the temperature would still continue to rise. Finally, the fever had stopped rising.

"What are we going to do?" said Beastboy.

"Wait for a miracle,"

"And I'm going to stay here," said Beastboy.

"But Beastboy," Starfire said.

"Try and make me leave," he challenged.

And so he remained there for the next few hours.

--

"I won't hurt you, Raven, not an amazing creature like you," Slade lunged for her, hissing menacingly.

Raven's eyes flew open. Her mind was in a whirl as she sat herself up.

Where am I? She thought. She looked around. The sight was familiar. Whitewash walls, medical equipment… She looked towards the Titan's Tower Infirmary clock, which read 3:00AM - wait...

_Titan's Infirmary... No… _she thought. Everything rushed back to her as she remembered the events of the past months, even the strange dreams…_ I should have been dead by now…_

She looked beside her to find a figure with a mass of tousled dark green hair and lighter green skin. The steady rise and fall of his body indicated that he was sound asleep. _Beastboy, _she thought. She sighed softly and looked at her hands, they were bandaged, but not painful.

_Something's not right. Why do I feel so… peaceful?_ Then she noticed her arms, which were not covered by the medical gown and gasped slightly. Under the dim light of the infirmary, her skin no longer had a grayish tint. They were still pale and fair, but they had a slight peach color to it.

_This can't be…_ she thought. She decided to test her powers. Carefully and silently, using a lot of effort, she painfully sat up and dangled her legs at the side of the bed. Hung on the bed frame was a clean cloak. She reached over and wrapped herself in it and put her hood up as she shivered from the sudden cold. _They must've known I'd like my cloak when I woke up,_ she thought.

Still seated on the side of the bed, she tried testing her powers on a nearby cup of water. Raven concentrated as she found her centre and focused on the cup. The cup merely trembled as she tried her best to bring it over. She leaned forward slightly.

"What have I done?" She asked herself as she recalled the dreams. Ah!" she screamed as she clutched her throbbing chest and fell to the floor. The cup of water fell to the floor. Luckily, it was made of plastic so it did not shatter upon impact with the ground.

This caused Beastboy to jump up from his sleep, "Holy bananas the monkeys are taking over the world – Oh my goodness Raven!" he jumped to her side as she continued to cough.

"Rae why did you are you okay what's the matter you shouldn't have - CYBORG!" he continued to stammer as he sat beside her, pressed his communicator and screamed for Cyborg.

Raven pulled herself away as she broke down into a coughing fit. She didn't want to be here, she didn't want to believe anything that just happened.

_Those visions can't be true, your powers aren't working..._

She continued to reject Beastboy's efforts to calm her down.

_They're just nightmares, they're just nightmares..._

However, she was too weak physically to push him away and she was soon overpowered by Beastboy, who knelt in front of her and placed his hands gently but firmly on her shoulders, preventing her from going anywhere. She struggled, but to no avail. During the short 6 months of her absence, he had certainly grown.

"Raven…" he said as he gently let down her hood and he gasped, "You're… you're…"

She cried even harder and tried to push him away.

_Shit Beastboy you made her cry more, you loser, _Beastboy thought and he cursed himself for being such an immature pinhead even after all the months that she had been away for.

He didn't let her go. Instead, he pulled her into a gently but firm embrace.

Raven gasped in shock when her body came into sudden physical contact with the changeling's warm body. Her body, which had been iced many times, burned at his touch.

_She's cold... Just like the time when she comforted me... _Beastboy thought._  
_

Just then Cyborg came rushing in, still half asleep, "Where's the fire?"

Raven turned around to face him, still sobbing. As she did, so did Beastboy.

As soon as he saw her sitting up in bed, Cyborg immediately perked up and smiled, "Raven you're up! That's great!" Just then he noticed her human appearance. "What… what happened?" He rubbed his human eye to check if he was still dreaming.

Raven turned away and continued crying softly into Beastboy's shoulder.

_What's wrong Raven, what's wrong? _Wondered Beastboy

Nothing blew up, nothing flew through walls, nothing glowed black.

--

Chapter Preview:

"... Her demon DNA is a part of her, just like how mechanical parts are a part of me. Without her demon side, she'll… die..."

--

"But Beastboy… what if… I don't want to get them back?"

"What?"

"What if I don't want to get my powers back? What if I want to remain like this?"

"But… "

--

"Titans! Trouble!" said Robin over their communicators. "On the rooftop!"

Rooftop? Raven thought, as she and Beastboy made their way to the roof. Please, don't let this be…

--

**I'm sure your heads are swirling with enough questions already ; )**


End file.
